Pushed you to the back of my mind.

I have since 2002.

But here I am again. Wondering. About you.

Would you laugh a silly laugh? Would your pretty eyes make me melt?

Questions come easy… Remembering how I felt.

Carried you. Briefly.

Suppressed the memory. It was easier than accepting loss.

Wiser now. Realize I cannot toss. You. Away.

Only God knows best. You were never meant to be. Physically.

Your memory though… will always grow.

Never gave you a name. But you would’ve been my second child to love.

So I think that is what I’ll call you.


According to health experts with American Psychological Association, “the impact and emotional stress associated with miscarriage is often underestimated.”
Though I did not – seeking the help of a professional counselor is very common and beneficial. As I write, I hope this serves to help someone who just may be dealing with the loss of an unborn child.

9 thoughts on “Love…

  1. In 1990 wife and I suffered this same loss. One minute we’re floating on air after learning that we were six weeks with child, and the next minute (just days after in fact) we’re questioning God as to how something like ‘this’ could happen. I definitely feel your retrospection on this and by sharing your story you’re going to help countless women / couples come to grips with theirs.

  2. Hey, Dionne… it happened to me too. What you wrote is therapeutic…even moreso to go ahead and name the baby. You know in your gut if it is a girl or boy. S/he will be there in heaven to greet you. I’m looking forward to the day that I meet my little man. God bless you.
    L. Michelle Humphress

  3. D, never knew this was part of your life journey. Wow. My youngest daughter experienced it too. So true, miscarriage doesn’t get the attention it deserves. Sometimes even those who go through it don’t always give it the attention it deserves, thinking they’re okay only to realize later they are traumatized. I learned so much about ME during that time and it wasn’t all good, either. Took my daughter years to come to grips with it all. She’s healed now and in graduate school. “Standing emotional ovation” to you and all who get through it. #helpyourselfbygettinghelp

  4. I’ve always seen you as my strong, fearless, big sister and reading your blog today brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing your deepest feelings, thoughts, & heart it took a tremendous amount of courage to do so!!! Love you always!

  5. Dionne, it takes a lot of courage and faith to take this walk and be vulnerable. I pray that someone hearing your voice will be healed, restored and encouraged. Oh, I’m so, so grateful that God placed you in my life. You are a joy. A real woman–walking, talking, homemade love. Thank you so much for being a blessing so you can bless others.

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